A very irregular head

Almost all the songs are written by a certain Syd Barrett, unlike on all their later albums, on which he doesn’t even appear anymore. I read that Syd quickly left the band, or was he kicked out? He would have been behaving erratically due to excessive use of psychoactive substances. Some even believe he has gone crazy, like my former schoolfriend. Or was it more that he did not agree with the direction in which the band wanted to evolve and rebelled against it and then quit himself? Only his former entourage knows.

I dive into his solo work, even his unfinished and most experimental demos. I get overfascinated. While the other boys in my class walk around with photos of their first love, I have Syd Barrett‘s in my wallet. I listen to every bootleg I find. I am deeply touched by his very last recordings of “It’s Obvious”. He leaves a lasting deep impression on me. At that time, it’s not obvious at all why he inspires me so much.

Syd, the years pass and my focus on you fades until much later I experience mental difficulties myself and think back to you. I read your biography and this clarifies former enigmas. I am now convinced that you have consciously sought out a hermit’s life, you are actually a Johatsu, you are reborn. Everything was indeed obvious for you.  Psychedelics have given you the wisdom to no longer trade your inherent passion for activities that deny your true self. Through the song “Jugband Blues” on Pink Floyd’s second album you consciously and formally say goodbye to normal life. The life that you are supposed to lead according to the rules of our society, but that you reject. This song still moves me deeply every time I hear it. I made a personal Dutch version of the lyrics, just like of the depressive “Opel” and the manic “Octopus”.

Being a adult doesn’t make much sense to you. The fact that, just like with Roger Waters and myself, your father is not a full-fledged pillar of support has maybe enhanced that vision. Your first album is full of disguised children’s songs to desperately maintain the link with your joyful youth. There’s no place in your soul for the spotlight and following the commercial path. You only want to concentrate on your own mission and experience it in your own intimacy. You create paintings like I now do and immediately destroy them because their role has already been played out, just like you killed Syd and became Roger again.

Although misunderstood by the big world of success and failure with which you have no connection and where you do not know how to behave, you initially try to adapt yourself, just like me, like a conscientious student of life. You look all over the place for a place for you but it ain’t anywhere, it just ain’t anywhere. People think you’re crazy but you voluntarily lock yourself in your safe cocoon with a minimalist lifestyle. Now you can fully develop your visionary and alternative ideas, you are at your best. You may miss the recognition that you could have had as a celebrity, but that does not outweigh the freedom and liberation you are now experiencing. I fully understand why you appeal to me so much. You will always have a special place in my heart.